Monday, December 20, 2010

Out to Sea

Mom’s funeral was yesterday. I did the same thing I did with Darcy, we went and scattered her ashes at sea. Although it is still raining throughout SoCal, down in Costa Mesa at the coast it was barely raining at all, so it wasn’t a problem.

However, the sea’s were pretty rough so we had to make it quick and hold tight to the railing. Bennet and Summer were the only ones there. I told them they were the only family I had left and Summer hugged me and said I wasn’t going to get rid of her, ever. Bennet agreed, said he wouldn’t even be here today if it wasn’t for me so anything I needed they would do.

All very emotional, especially when you consider that I’m not really related to them, Bennet is Darcy’s son so he is my stepson, and Summer is my step Daughter-in-law. Making Ally my step-granddaughter.

But I’ve always felt that family is the people you choose more than the accidents you were born with. My mom was not the best mom in the world but she wasn’t the worst either. She is the one person who knew me for the entire 57.5 years of my life - or the last one left, anyway. My sister did and so did my dad. But my dad died when I was 13 and my sister around 6 years ago of cancer.

I’m still stuck in a deep depression, hope it lifts soon.

Friday, December 10, 2010


My mom died yesterday. Actually she died Nov 16 but they didn't bother to tell me until yesterday. She was in pretty bad shape at 93, dementia had taken her mind away, to the point where she couldn't even speak but could only make animal noises. It was hard to watch. I didn't visit her much because she hadn't recognized me for 4 years now. I would stop by occasionally to make sure the nursing home was taking good care of her.

The picture is Darcy and Mom from about 15 years ago, it's not very good but it's the only one I can find. Darcy is only 5' 4" tall so you can see how short Mom was. The most startling thing over the last 4 years was her face. When no one was home any more her face underwent a dramatic change, very shocking to look at.

At one time all the women in my life were threatening to die on me; our cat Nikko (she was our baby), my sister, Darcy and my mom. My sister died of cancer one day before her 60th birthday, Darcy died one week before her 61st birthday, but my mom outlasted all of them at 93. She was always pretty tough, but I think even she felt it was time to go because she was barely eating. Food used to be her favorite thing, as a tiny, old woman she could put away quantities that would put a truck driver to shame.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Sen Bernie Sanders

There Is A WAR Being Waged Against The Working Families Of America!